Finding the Right Therapist
You’ll need to find a therapist with whom you have a good fit. I’ve provided much on this website for you to get a sense of me—my training and experience for those who want to know that--and a sense my personality, such as my warmth and compassion and ability to create safety. We can also use our introductory phone call and first session(s) for us to get a feeling of the rightness of our fit to work together.
How It Works
Besides particular techniques, much of the healing in psychotherapy happens in the relationship that you have with your therapist. If we can feel the empathy and support of a therapist, we can heal not getting these needs met in other relationships—in particular those with parents and childhood caregivers—and we can finish therapy with a strong sense of our self, and thus have satisfying relationships in the present. From our therapist we can expect to feel emotional attunement, appreciation, validation, respect, and support; we can feel free to express all of our emotions, even work through any misunderstandings with our therapist; we can feel connected and as though we matter, and we can have someone who can celebrate our progress and growth.
In particular, and believe it or not one thing that most clients have difficulty with, is that we will be curious about what works well between us, and we will "privilege the positive." We will be detectives for those glimmers of change and transformation that are there in you from the beginning.
When you feel safe with me, I will help encourage you to feel and express emotions that you may have avoided feeling. This journey of discovery into our most vulnerable feelings includes focusing on the body--again a different way of working from most "talk" therapy--and we'll see what sensations you have in your body, and metaphors and images emerge -- sometimes before words. We will track moment-to-moment, and we'll find ways to express the unexpressable. And we'll amplify and delight in what feels good. We'll notice when the unconscious peeks through – memories or images that will appear as we are speaking, and dream images you remember having had while sleeping.
This is hard work, and you need to be willing to be committed to this work. The end result will be that you will speak boldly your personal truths, dream your wildest dreams and longings, and take action on them.
Getting Everything You Really Want
You will not only heal and get unstuck, but you will feel empowered, and you will know and speak your deepest and truest self, and you will get everything that you really want from life, including satisfying relationships, meaningful work, and creative expression.